Have you successfully freed yourself of emotily abusive parents?

This may sound pathetic, but I am an adult and my family is still able to hurt me. My father is very judgmental and critical of me. How can I be strong and get past being concerned what he thinks or ruminating over petty family politics? My brother is the favorite for sure and though my father runs his life, he gets financial istance from him on a regular basis. I just get judged and criticized. He and my also stepmother "punish" me for not going along with their sh*t. My SM has been slowly alienating me and expects my daughter to call her Grandma. For Mother's Day my family did our own thing. In response, my father took an indirect shot at me for the amount of time I've been in college(I'm almost done) and economic situation. Almost nothing I do is good enough for him and somehow I set myself up for judgment. Can you offer some insight or success stories of your own to help me fee myself from the burden of this hurt?